“Have patience with all things. But, first of all with yourself” – Saint Francis de Sales
Time appears to go fast, children grow fast; our grandmothers would announce, “Oh, you children grow up faster than back in my day”; now our mothers are saying the same. Is this true? If so, what is it about?
“Time flies,” we all say! We see friends and say, “I’m so busy, the time has flown since we saw each other” and even feel a little guilty. Medical check-ups and reminders come around; servicing the car, paying rates, children’s Birthdays, even our Birthday is here in a blink.
The reality of our world right now is that we feel we are immersed in a fog-like-cloud flying with the ‘Time’.
Unfortunately, with the flying of time or our perception of it also goes a bunch of fundamental social skills. Manners are fewer, general caring and consideration for others appear to be declining and expectations of receiving something immediately take over.
Fast food is everywhere making it easy to grab dinner going home from children’s activities, we had every intention of cooking a healthy meal, we even imagined pre-prepared meals and super organisation and then time ran away. As each new day starts there seems to be no time for idle moments or thought, we need to keep moving because the chores call, a quick shake whilst hanging up washing saves on ironing because gone are the days of standing doing a pile of therapeutic ironing, where we reflected on the week and contemplated life.
Quick and fast continues with homework, outside activities, getting out and about, communicating, facebooking and getting jobs done. Then when the QUICK just isn’t QUICK enough we become ‘Impatient’! Ahhhh!!
The ‘State of Impatience’ invites with open arms the losing of tempers, speaking without thinking, being reactive instead of proactive, slamming, shouting and arguing. Things can get out of control causing hurt, sadness and feelings of being alone. In the past we have had clever strategies to cope in these situations, until next time comes around and it’s all the same again.
It’s a sign of insanity to keep doing the same thing over and over expecting a different outcome; and we wonder how it got to be so overwhelming?
We’ve all heard “Stop and Smell the Roses”, that magical phrase, the one we tend to forget until somehow for some unexplained reason we are reminded. When we choose to stop, reflect, question and understand why we are receiving the message, then we can take positive action. If we don’t notice we end up overheating and blowing a gasket like an un-serviced car, it’s an unhealthy space to live in.
A ‘State of Impatience’ created by wanting everything now is impacting on our health/wellbeing and our relationships, especially with our children because we are their role models. Is having children wired for busyness something that we want for them?
The control is ours; we can make conscious choices and change the patterns now and show our children life can be improved by changing our behaviours, routines and words. There are massive benefits in making these changes in life and also understanding the benefits is important because as human beings we only do something if it will benefit us.
When in the ‘State of Impatience’, stop and choose to change, firstly for our health/wellbeing, then for the impact it has on our children and our relationships.
Tip for living in a ‘State of Patience’:
- Breathe (take 10 deep breathes)
- Let go of expectations and ‘should dos’
- Recognise the ‘State of Impatience’
- Appreciate red lights (it’s a message)
- Thank a slow computer (take a small break)
- Prioritize
- Let something go
- Clear the clutter, releasing negative energy
- Be with positive people
- Practise ‘calmness’
- Eliminate toxic relationships
- Practise ‘being slower’
- Be comfortable with making different choices creating quality time
Benefits:
- Playing and connection
- Connecting with friends/grandparents etc
- Supporting children with homework, growth and development
- Showing those around us we love them
- Special quality time for ourselves and relationships
- Connect with our children, making homemade presents, wrapping paper, cards, etc.
Benefits:
- Brings children together creating and interacting
- Sharing and connecting
- Creates interesting conversation
- Gives awesome opportunities to share our stories (they love this)
- Saves money
- Models enjoyment/connection and creativity
- Emotional Wellbeing
- Book a retreat giving ourselves permission to refresh, revive, re-think, renew, re-engage and re-energise. Clear our headspace and connect with our heart space.
- Engage a Life Coach, gaining clarity, focus, direction, new possibilities and opportunities.
Be with ‘Patience’ and enjoy the new way of driving life! It’s simply a choice!
“We could never learn to be brave and patient if there were only joy in the world.” – Helen Keller
“also published in havenmagazine.com
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